Ryan is so excited about his Auntie’s wedding ceremony. He gets to walk down the aisle with the ring pillow and his little Paris escorts is puffed out in pride!
Alisha is her Mother’s “petal girl” and loves putting on her flower girl dress at home and twirling around as she looks forward to the wedding day next month.
It’s truly remarkably how much joy children bring to a wedding ceremony and celebration. Remarkably, children really can’t do anything “wrong” at a wedding and yet it’s perplexing to me how a bride and groom may worry about “children being perfect” during a wedding ceremony.
A wedding day is all about the imperfections of lifetime moments. Yes, children are are a wild card on a wedding day. Depending on the age of a child, just getting kids down the aisle in one piece is a major event!
I’ve been to a wedding where the flower girl sat down in the middle of the aisle during the wedding processional and started playing with her flowers. A few months ago, I watched a ring bearer start down the aisle and run the other way. I also remember when two flower girls walked half-way down the aisle together only to freeze-up in mid-aisle!
Were these wedding moments a wreck?
Actually, they were joyful, fun and hugely memorable! The people in each wedding situation “rolled with it,” laughed and had a good. time. Yes, the flower girl was finally helped to her feet and the run-a-way ring boy was caught and brought back to the ceremony. And the two flower girls was coaxed to move on.
As you consider how to incorporate children into a wedding ceremony, here are a few words of wisdom from someone who has worked with hundreds of wedding ceremonies:
Don’t Put The Rings On The Ring Pillow ~ In moments when adults aren’t looking, rings may go missing or a mischievous little one could tie and re-tie a bow so it’s impossible to get the rings off a pillow without scissors. Give the rings to the Best Man or Best Man and Maid of Honor and let the little one walk down the aisle with the ceremony ring pillow or ring box.
Consider A Children’s Parade ~ Instead of a solo flower girl or ring bearer, what about gathering children under 10 years of ago and creating a “children’s parade?” I wove this concept into a wedding ceremony several years ago and it was a smashing success. Since then, we’ve had many parades at wedding ceremonies!
Last Minute “I Don’t Want To Go” ~ If a young child is fussing at the last minute, hit the re-set button. For instance, yesterday, I officiated Chris and Tandy’s wedding ceremony at a beautiful chapel. Tandy’s son was fussing at the last moment just as he was to walk down the aisle with his Mommy. Rather than pushing the child to “perform,” we quickly flipped things around and Tandy was escorted down the aisle by the Groom’s Father. And all was beautiful.
If a child doesn’t want to go down an aisle, don’t push it. Go to Plan B and move on. In this wedding work that I do, I find that the majority of kids want a “big job” in a wedding ceremony and are thrilled for the big day.